"I'm not strong enough to stay away from you anymore..."

Okay folks, big news. Lots of big news. I will summarize:

1. GCSE Results. POO! I got the equivalent of 6A*s, 4A's, 1B, 2Cs and an E. NOT GOOD ENOUGH MY FRIEND!

2. Enrolled at college with mein good friend Charles Walker. I lost my ID card within seconds (and metres) of getting it. He is still ripping me about it right now!

3. I watched Twilight for the first time ever today and didn't hate it. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!

Ok? Bye x.

Believe your beliefs and doubt your doubts."

Soooo, right now I am in a dilema posing situation. By my strict rules my first food of the day is always either a sandwich (but it has to be after 12pm to eat a sandwich) or bran flakes (but it has to be before 7am to eat Bran Flakes. It's currently... 11.04am and I am and have been famished for ages, but I cannot choose, do I wait until 12 for the sandwich, or go get some bran flakes then count that as my lunch? Also, I suppose I should really step up the detox, as no-one wants to see a fatty in swimwear :L.

Nothing much has happened since my last post. I expect nothing much is going to happen before my next post. GCSE results in five days. Quite busy this coming week actually. GOing to Danielle's or she's coming to mine on Monday, swimming with Mosex, DUnders, Spliffy, Katie, Laura+KWatkins on Tuesday, Katja's sleeping for the days up to results day, so probably Tuesday+Wednesday night, Wednesday my room's getting trashed by the council, but I don't care, I expect myself and KWatkins will be in York, Thursday is results day, Friday probably get new phone, Tuesday after going into town for birthday supllies, Thursday it's my BIRTHDAY :O. Then the following Wednesday start college.

Bah Humbug.

"become what you always were - a very big fish."

I think possibly two of my favourite quotes of all time come from one book: Alice In Wonderland. The first is: "If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?” and the second is: "I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!". I think they pretty much define me and my mood right now :).

Also, I was looking back over old photos when I realised it's nearly thirty months since I was in my two favourite places in the whole wide world: Singapore+New Zealand. Being there made me realise that we all really are tiny little fish in a big pond, yet at home, in our daily lives, we're really just fish in a small tank. Did you that the bigger tank a goldfish has, the bigger it will grow? I guess people are kinda the same. The more room someone has, giving them space, allowing them to learn from their own successed and failings, the more that person will grow -not in stature, obviously, but in character. Singapore+New Zealand, I guess, were the first chance I got to be that big fish. I genuinely had the time of my life. Only trouble is, now I feel like a big fish in a small pond. I want to get out and make my own mistakes, meet new people, see everything.

GSCE Exam Results. 27th August 2009. I guess it could be make or break day for a lot of people. I should probably be more worried than I am. I was targeted to get 8A*s and a Distinction in BTEC Media. I would say that's highly unlikely. I got two of the A*s already in English Language and Science (yes, science, i was shocked too :L), so that leaves six. So I'd say maybe five in total at a big push! Although, if I get five I will be happy, as mother agreed if I get five or more A*s I can get a tattoo :D. Also, I was meant to be getting a phone if I got good results, and this morning my phone broke, which I don't know whether to take as fate, or a mere coincidence. Even if it is fate, it may not be good, maybe it broke because I'm gonna get bad results and I will need an excuse to get a new phone? I hope not. Good look to anyone getting results in the next few weeks :).

Since my last post nothing much has happened, except a big ole shopping trip where I went on a sickening Primani binge and bought quite a lot of new clothes, including, for some reason, a shirt like Rodrigo from Big Brother. Also, I've been going even more bleach crazy and now have some pretty awesome tie-bleached jeans :D.

I'll stop my ranting now. Love x.

"And God said blessed are the geeks, for they shall inherit the Earth"

Sooooooo. I didn't realise it's been a week since my last blog. Well, over a week, eight days
to be exact. Nothing has really changed, I'm still extremely bored, as I am every holidays. One improvement, I have discovered I am extremely good at self control and am considering a career as a weight loss counsellor. Since my last (rather irrate) post I've lost FIVE inches. Oh yeah. So I have blown the person who made me angry and their '22 inch waist' out of the water :D:D

After doing nothing with my holidays, I finally finished reading The Age of Innocence. It's... average? Started on To Kill A Mockingbird now :)

Also, I've realised it's been a long time, at least a month, since I have indulged my inner sci-fi nerd, so I'm going to watch every series of Torchwood, series 2 through Planet of the Dead of Doctor Who and Spooks: [Code 9] on DVD. :D.

x

also, if you were wondering, the title is a quote by Charlie Green in Spooks: [Code 9]. :L.

"In reality they all lived in a kind of hieroglyphic world, where the real thing was never said or done or even thought..."

Ok, so this is going to be a bit of a rant but anyways...

I have nothing against celebrities, and infact I can appreciate how hard it must be with media speculation always focused on them, but sometimes they're just so annoying. So, this is how my day went... I logged onto Twitter, and I see a certain celebrity has been ranting about her weight (I have no issue with this, because people always call this person fat, so it's only fair she should be able to respond). But why on Earth does this person have to go into details about their size? I mean, fair enough, this person isn't by any means fat, but giving personal details to justify this? Why?! To make everyone else feel bad? They say that all this focused on being a size zero and 'perfect' in the media gives people eating disorders? WRONG! It's when people who are meant to be 'healthy' role models for girls come out and say such things!

I'm kind of peeved now because I wasn't too bothered about my holidays junk food baby, but now something must be done! The twins have got to go! Starting tomorrow I'm eating only lettuce, jogging and doing as much excercise as possible!

Also, it was Mutti's Birthday yesterday :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUTTI!

I'm going to lose calories by munching on celery now, wish me luck :D

"Speaking as a completely objective third party observer with absolutely no personal interest in the matter..."

So, first blog time i guess? Scary?! Here goes:

My name is Gillian Amy. Everyone calls me Gillian. Hopefully you'll never forget that, but I'll let you call me Gill, Ian, Fatty, The Bubble, Ronarry GingerTwin, Gillie, or pretty much anything, tbh. I was born and raised near York. I like Yorkshire. The people smile a lot and say 'hello' and 'how are you.' And then you say 'hello' back.Gillian means 'youthful' and Amy means 'beloved', which is ironic because I don't believe I have ever been 'youthful' and I crave to be 'beloved'. The way you treat me is the way I'll treat you. If I'm interested in something I can talk about it to anyone for hours. When you are little they tell you you can be whoever you want to be, but they never tell you that being yourself is okay. Funny that. I'm almost always bored. My head is pretty much in the clouds, not the gutter. I love taking photos, some would say that makes me a camera whore. I would not change myself for anybody or anything, if you don't like me as I am, that's your issue, not mine.

I'm a vegan, Christian, short, geeky, blue eyed, petite, loud yet shy, focused, determined, sixteen year old and I like foreign packaging on snack foods. I like symmetry. I like reading really old books with big words. I love giving to charities too. I like bright colours on clothes. Well it depends on what mood I'm in. I like pharmaceutical medicine wrappers. I like people who don’t smile. Ever. And I like people who do smile. I hate shoes. I hate judgemental people. I hate homophobia. I hate people who change their voices when they say something important. I hate my thighs. I hate dripping taps. I like trains and boats, they go places. I’m scared of jelly. And old people. And pregnant people and anything that flies. I love Doctor Who. I hate people with pointy hands. I hate having wet feet and the feel of cotton wool. I love to laugh. I like Russell Howard and I like pistachio nuts. I hate rudeness and bad table manners. I don't like Miley Cyrus, but annoyingly I know all the words to all the songs in Hannah Montanna. I admire The Jonas Brothers, infact, I'd quite like to be a Jonas Brother, tbh. I always think endings of things are never good enough. I take Torchwood way to seriously. I want to join real-life Torchwood. I dislike children. I don't understand them because I never was one. I want to travel, particularly to New York and China. I love reading. The Bible is the best book ever written. I read it daily. I love going to the seaside. I hate being in a large group of people. I hate one word text messages and people who argue on social networking sites. At least have the guts to do it face to face. I like wearing pumps. I hate bullies. I love the old universities. Maybe one day I'll get to one, Oxford, Cambridge, maybe? Yale would be the dream :)


I sometimes feel like I'm Alice in Wonderland :) and sometimes I wish I was Alice in Wonderland.